Saturday, June 16, 2007

Toys Will Be Toys

Not surprisingly, our family has been caught up in the "Thomas Recall" madness. We always knew that The Man would try to corrupt and impede Zane from reaching his full potential. Who knew The Man would do it by covering Zane’s favorite playthings with lead paint?

Here’s a photo of the Thomas toys that have been recalled:

Oh good. There for a minute I was worried. Zane only has 5 of the 23 toys that contain lead. I’m quite sure this means that he has only a 21.7% chance of having ill effects. Conversely, though, I’m canceling his OT appointment on Monday as I’m sure that any and all of his delays are Thomas-induced.


(Actually, all offending toys have been removed from the train table, and the little spoiled guy hasn’t even noticed.)

In other toy-related matters, Zane has rediscovered a gift he received from his last birthday.

FYI, the babies’ names are “Cabbage” and “Truck”, and he put them in their “Baby Box” so that I could take a picture.

While I find this very charming (as is his insistence that we call him “Whitey the Tomcat”), I am now slightly concerned it’s the lead talking.


jotcr2 said...

You mean that he hasn't noticed 'yet'.

SRH said...

Hey! Wait a second. I am technically the Man (white married male raised as a Christian {it didn't take so well} between the ages of 25 and 55) and I find fault with your logic. The Man would never taint Thomas the Tank Engine merchandise because of 2 reasons.

Reason 1: this would interfere with the capitalist market economy. If people can buy cigarettes they should be able to buy lead painted toys.

Reason 2: Too many affluent white kids play with these particular toys.

Beth said...

Maybe all MY problems stem from lead in my toys as a child! :D

But seriously, WTF? I grew up in the 70s, so lead was practically a pre-req for toys. But Thomas toys? What were they thinking????

Nadolny said...

Hmmm, I have three I need to get rid of.

Garbo said...

No, it's not the lead talking. When Tova was that age, she issued a constant stream of urgent commands and gibberish which disconcerted anyone outside our family. Adult friends would attempt to sit in an apparently empty seat in our car, and my child would shout "You're sitting on the Pootie Tooties!" All I ever knew about the Pootie Tooties was that there was a boy one and a girl one, and that they didn't care to be sat on. Debra and I knew to check for Pootie Tooties before we sat down but we often forgot to warn guests.

Zany Mama said...

Good point. I'm sure he'll develop a terrible case of missing James soon. (It will probably be induced by lead withdrawal).

The Man-
You provide a compelling argument, but of course the devil can quote scripture to suit his purposes.

This appears to be a similar case.

I know - every child plays with Thomas at some point.
Although I have long suspected that there is an 'evil genius room' where such personas gather to congregate and plot wrack and ruin, I was disappointed to learn that they target young children.

Boo hiss.

Get rid of them quick! In my estimation, Andy has already experienced double exposure - from Scoot AND Zane.

It's like radiation, right? There's a danger zone around anyone who has handled lead-based James?

Pootie tooties? I love it!

From now on I, too, will check for pootie tooties before I sit down.

That's just good fun.

Bon said...

i apparently live in a bucket, or at least a world as yet untainted by Thomas toys and lead paint. so far as i know...?

but seriously. wtf is up with lead paint? who doesn't know that's bad?

i am so naive. :) thanks for the heads up. hope the lead poisoning, you know, wears off fast. (eep)

Anonymous said...

Would you have felt better if he named them Sweetheart and Duchess?

belsum said...

Cabbage, Truck, and Whitey the Tomcat are about the awesomest names for anything. EVER!