Thursday, January 18, 2007

Could We Please Talk About Something Else?

So where’s the “funny” in my life right now?

Good question. I’ve been pondering this lately, and it’s why I haven’t been blogging much. Because whining doesn’t suit me (not to mention the fact that it’s off-putting), and I am not a “naked” blogger – one who shares every feeling that comes to mind, no matter how morose or self-pitying.

But I’m struggling to come up with an “angle” or interesting way to discuss a childcare crisis, gallbladder pain and impending surgery, and the fact that I left my $80 yoga mat in the rental car I used last week.

I tried the limerick route. Then it was onto the list of what crazy (and mean) things my hungry self is willing to do. Then, I dressed Zane up for a pep squad – because when feeling bad, it’s always best to torture small children. But now I’m fresh out of ideas.

So I guess I’ll just lay it out.

  1. Childcare. SRH and I have been cobbling together care for the past two weeks while Zane’s care providers have been ill. They’ll get better – but not better enough. They’re getting older, and their health is poor. It’s a really sad reality, but it’s time to move on.

Solution A: Find new childcare.

So this one seems self-explanatory – call area care providers, do interviews, and pick one. EXCEPT most childcare centers in our neighborhood don’t provide part-time care, and any in-home provider we use can’t have cats, dogs, or carpet. Either option must be comfortable caring for a child with multiple food allergies and severe asthma. Like way-severe asthma. Like massive amounts of medication asthma. And I must be comfortable that they can do it.

Surprisingly, I’m not getting very far on that front.

Solution B: Quit my job and provide my own g.d. childcare.

So, this one is looking better and better except for one fact: I’ve lived in poverty, and I don’t much care for it.

We’ll leave that one on the table for now.

Solution C: Continue to cobble together care.

This has worked for two weeks; perhaps I should carry on for a while. Of course, it’s downright ugly in our house right now – I’m flexing my work schedule, SRH is flexing his work schedule, I’m at the computer working during every spare moment, and I’m constantly feeling guilty for not doing enough at work or home. On the other hand, it keeps me from breaking Grandma D and Grandpa R’s heart by telling them that we’re moving on. There’s some benefit there. (I am such a wuss).

  1. Gallbladder. I can’t get into the surgeon until Feb. 12th. So I’m on an extremely low-fat diet until then. SRH reports that this makes me both tired and grumpy, but I’m quite sure that I’m only tired and grumpy because I’m the only one doing anything around here! (I’m also quite sure that the preceding is a completely accurate statement and is not at all influenced by a lack of fuel to the brain).

Solution A: Continue to eat a bunch of nothing for the next month. Oh sure it makes me grumpy, but I’m slowly figuring out how to walk that tightrope between eating enough to live and avoiding severe pain.

As a bonus, I see that old pencil skirt from Banana Republic rotating back into the wardrobe.

Solution B: Go balls to the wall – eat a scrumptious dinner and chase it with a trip to the ER. However the question lingers in my mind: Will they really be willing to take it out that night or will I have to be in burning agony for 2-3 days before the offensive gland is taken from me?

I’m still not sure which way to jump on this one. Right now, I’m going the safer, hungrier route.

  1. Yoga Mat. For the second time in a year, I have managed to lose my too expensive yoga mat. (For details of the first time, see here).

Solution A: Harass and harangue the folks who fixed my hail-damaged car last week (those folks who so generously loaned me a 15-year-old rental car) until they get my yoga mat back.

Or I suppose I could ask nicely, but people who are famished tend more toward making demands rather than reasonable requests in sotto voce.

Solution B: Go to the yoga studio, and take someone else’s mat. Hey, it’s not my style, but someone clearly did it with my first mat. I’m simply suggesting that I use a proven strategy for obtaining a yoga mat at low-cost.


jw said...

Wow. Umm, Good Luck? I'm not sure of what inspiring and uplifting words to offer without inadvertently placing myself in the sights of a Trigger Happy Crazy Hungry Lady. (One false move, and the next thing you know you are sporting one less head that's being gnawed on by said Crazy Hungry Lady.)
So again, good luck, feel better soon, and I Hope you find a babysitter w/ the right qualifications swiftly.

K said...

Have you called North Broadway Children's Center? I don't know if they have part time care, but they are fantastic and if our son had allergies and asthma, i would trust them to provide appropriate care. Good luck!

S. said...

I hope you feel better soon. Sorry you have to wait until the 12th.

Mom said...

You really don't need to steal a yoga mat. Just go to yoga and find and mat that looks like yours and assume it must be! (Well, how it get here? What a coincidence.)

As for the all out eating/ emergency surgery, it may take two or three days if you do it on a Saturday night like I did but only the first 12 hours is really agony. Then they finally give you demoral.

allrileyedup said...

You can have my yoga mat. It has a nice satiny carrying case with butterflies on it. You know what else you can have? The gift certificate to 6 yoga sessions at some school in Laguna Beach. I received the two as a gift almost a year ago and it has become painfully obvious to me that it's never going to happen. You can also have my babysitter who doesn't exist, which should make her easily transportable.

In all seriousness, good luck with everything. I chose the stay-at-home route. It's all right, but requires good budgeting and agreement on said budgeting. We're still working on that whole "agreement" thing over year (ie. Guitars are not part of the food and necessities category)

allrileyedup said...

P.S. It should say "over here" not "over year" in the above comment.

belsum said...

I just noticed you have a category called "other stuff that worries me". Not to make light but...that's hilarious! I love it!

Nadolny said...

I'd be happy to do Teusday & Thursday pickups and lunch at X (your pick o fast food restaurant), but then I couldn't help with the childcare itself as we have a) a dog (soon to be two, we are gettign a puppy) and b) carpet. Jodi has dust mite allergies, so we have been working on cleaning filters/carpets etc... more often, but it's not dust free by any stretch of the imagination. So although I can't really help with daily care, I can offer pickup services. If that's something you ever need, just let me know :)

zulhai said...

So hard. Are there any asthma support groups in town? The hospital might know. You could sit in on a meeting and ask about child care providers. Actually, the nurses who work on the Pediatrics floor, or with the Pulmonologist might have some names as well.
As for the non-fat diet, that is just some bad karma, there.
Hang tough.

Zany Mama said...

So speaks a man who is living with a woman about to give birth - much wisdom in your response.

Thanks for your wishes.

Thanks for stopping by - I'm just sorry you happened to do it at such a time of hunger and strife for me. I will tell you that I am typically eloquent, articulate, and briliant on this blog - but don't go back to read the archives, you aren't missing much.

I did try North Broadway, and if I had more energy, they might now officially be on my "nemesis" list. While they market that they offer part-time care, it's not really the case. I did refrain from calling the director a "liar pants" before I got off the phone, though, so I don't think I burned any briges.

Thanks, me too. Hope things are going well in your neck of the woods. I haven't been on-line much. I'll catch up soon.

Here's the thing, I'm one of the few Black yogis at the studio - if something goes missing, I'm going to get the blame.

It's just not worth it.

You are just so generous - I really appreciate it. However, I checked the imaginary babysitter's references and they said that she hates kids who have one-syllable names that begin with Z, so I thought about re-naming Zane but I just thought I'd keep looking.

Thanks for saying that staying home is "all right" - it's good to hear from someone who has done both and knows that neither is perfect.

Yeah, that one makes me smile.

SRH told me the other day, "It must be hell to be in your head," when I told him about yet another thing that worries me.

On the other hand, I don't particularly want to be in his head either - I think there is just a bunch of silence punctuated by an occasional Police song in that noggin. :)

Have I ever offered to sleep with you? Because if I haven't, I should.

Thanks, and I just may take you up on the lunch offer.

Wow - you and K decided to visit for the first time on a really dreadful post. Please keep in mind that I usually supply witty social commentary that promises to change the world as we know it. (Again, don't bother looking at the archives)

Anyhoo...thanks for stopping by.

Those are great suggestions. I did think about calling the Mothers of Asthmatics group to see their recomendations. Thanks for the reminder.

zingerzapper said...

Wow, what a bitchy blog. I say suck it up, pull yourself up by your designer bootstraps, get with the program, take one for the team, don't be a wuss.

See, I can be unsupportive when you need it. Otherwise you would have gotten a weepy blog about letting me help you, blah, blah, blah, and who the Hell needs that!

Anonymous said...

don't want to aggravate you, or add to your distress in any way, but what kind of yoga mat did you get for $80???? Mine was only $19.95. I wonder if the rental car insurance will cover that? Also, what exactly can you eat that doesn't bother your bilious gall bladder?

Zany Mama said...

I really appreciate your lack of support.

This mat is the best mat in the whole wide world. (not that I'm prone to hyperbole).

I'd link it for you, but I've never bothered to figure out how to do that in the commnents.

Just google "black yoga mat" and you'll see the cadillac of yoga mats.

You know what they say, Once you go black mat, you never go back.