Pink Pajamas

So…what the hell have I been doing, anyway?
I don’t blog. I don’t write (okay, so that’s redundant). I rarely call, and I leave you with only a post about breasts.

I am, indeed, trying to alienate everyone. It’s true.

In my defense, I asked SRH to let you folks know that I was on a mountainside in Massachusetts without access to internet or cell phone. And he did let you know…it’s just that he embedded the information between several mention of boobies, so you might not have noticed.

So, I was off in the mountains with a group of people from all over the world talking about realizing our highest possible future. It was divine. It was delightful, and I will post about it later.

In the meantime, here are a few other things that have been happening since last I slung the ink.

1. In the four nights I was absent from my home, my child was on an emotional roller coaster of raw emotion. He went from the wee small hills of sadness that he couldn’t get mama cuddles every morning to huge loop-de-loops of glee that he got four whole days of papa time.

I might feel hurt if I weren’t so relieved that he did so well while I was away.

2. Zingerzapper’s cancer has spread to her lymph nodes. So yeah, that sucks.

3. Zane bought me some hoochie pajamas for Mother’s Day. Apparently when SRH took him shopping, Zane insisted that I needed a pair of pink pajamas and quickly found a pair of Apple Bottom PJ’s for me. Not familiar with Apple Bottoms? Well, neither was I. Turns out, Apple Bottoms is a clothing company conceived by this guy. That’s right, it’s a clothing line by Nelly, he of the famed, “It’s getting hot in here, so take off all your clothes.”

Zane is so thrilled when I wear these pajamas that I don’t have the heart to burn them. I cannot, however, step onto my porch in them. I might get arrested for public indecency.

4. Today was Zane’s last day of preschool for the year. He was sorta sad. I cried.

5. I was approached to be on the board of a local agency today. I’m torn. I feel like it would be in my career best interests to join the board. I like the person who asked me, and I certainly appreciate that she is trying to connect me with the community muckety-mucks.

On the other hand, I don’t know if I’m a “board” kind of person. (And there I illuminate several stereotypes I’m holding. Whatever.) I also do not have the $500 they ask for from each board member personally, and I certainly don’t have the contacts to bring in the additional $500 they ask you to solicit from your circle. I do understand that this is actually a relatively small amount for board members to pay compared to other boards in my community, but I gotta tell you, I’m struggling to feel like this is something I need to give my energy (and money) to right now.

6. Drug-selling neighbors are lying low, but I haven’t forgotten them.

7. Zane has (re)discovered his most favorite private body part. And while I’m completely supportive of body pride and pleasure, I did have to set some ground rules this morning. For example, although it is preferable to lay at an incline whilst discovering oneself, you have to sit up straight during a breathing treatment. You may lay down and diddle when the breathy is done.

I am a stellar parent.

How have you guys been?