Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Meme- licious

Thea and Sue both tagged me for this particular meme* – a chance to share 7 random facts about myself. I’m going to dig deep here and NOT mention my food idiosyncrasies, tumors of myself or my friends, or food allergies/asthma.

7 Random Things About Me:

  1. I rarely (if ever) read non-fiction books. And if I do happen to start reading a book full of truth and not fantasy, I don’t finish it. I want to read about current and historical people and events. I do – in theory. In practice, I just can’t seem to make myself care enough to actually do it.

  1. I’m 5’ 2 ½”.

  1. The people who moved in three doors down are most certainly selling drugs, which means that I have determined that they must leave my neighborhood. I haven’t yet decided what will be my method of eviction, but they must go by the end of the summer.

  1. When wearing yellow, I resemble a banana. Sometimes light-skinned Black folks are called “high yellow”. Sometimes, it fits. Sometimes people should shut up.

  1. I’m the only child of a single parent.

  1. If you call my house and don’t identify who you are within 4 seconds, I will hang up. Every time. I hate the game of “guess who this is”. I don’t want to guess. Therefore, my friend B (whose voice I know quite well) starts every phone call with me, “Hey, it’s B.” I can almost hear her mutter under her breath, “So don’t hang up, okay?”

  1. I rub my feet against each other every night to fall asleep. We call it “feeting”. Zane does it, too.

Will seven of you please consider yourselves tagged? That’s how this is supposed to work, I think. Well, actually I’m supposed to tag 7 of you, but that seems like a lot to impose on people, so I’ll let you nominate yourselves. (I’m looking at you Nancy and Zulhai).

*On another note, both Thea and Sue also gave me a Thinking Blogger Award a while back; and I…uh…sorta forgot about it. Well, I didn’t forget about it immediately. At first, I felt all squeamish and undeserving – and I wasn’t sure what to do. Then, I felt a little faint from hunger. And then, I forgot. And now it just seems weird to post about it, but then I’m left feeling all ungrateful. So, Thea and Sue, here is my official thank you. I can’t imagine what you’re “thinking” when you read my blog, but I appreciate it all the same.

11 comments:

zulhai said...

Regarding the undesirable element in the neighborhood, here are 2 ideas:
1) I worked in a fancy candle shop all through college, and a lot of "witches" used to come in. I learned that to get rid of someone, you can write their name on a piece of paper, seal it up, like, in a jar, and put it way into the back of the freezer. I've always wanted to try that!
2) Call the Zoning department and report that it looks like they are "running some kind of a business out of their home."
I guess there is a another option,
3) Call the cops and say it looks like Crack has entered the neighborhood (-- finally!).
They don't mind checking stuff like that out, and they will keep your name anonoymous.
P.S. Happy Birthday!

nancy said...

I was gonna sign in as anonymous and make you GUESS who I was - ha ha!! And I am also 5'2 1/2 ".

I did the meme.

Dustin said...

Ooooo, crack house! If you really wanted to have some fun with them, just put a giant sign in their yard that says "CRACK SOLD HERE."

At the very least that'll turn the rest of the neighborhood against them and in the end, angry mobs are so much more fun than zoning officials.

Sue said...

Please share how you will get rid of them when you decide. You cerntainly make me laugh - don't you have to be able to think b4 you laugh? There you go.

:)

Thea said...

You make me think because...

wait. Why DID I nominate you? Damn.

My ology meme is finally up!!

lsig said...

Oooh, it's been a while since I've lived on the same street as blatant drug dealers!

(Sadly, you know I'm not joking about that). Best wishes for good riddance!

Zany Mama said...

zulhai-
I am so doing all three things you suggested - and I'm not even joking.

nancy-
It's a good height. Although the other day I stood on a stool and I realized that I was SRH's height - and I must admit, it felt powerful from up there.

dustin-
After talking to a few neighbors this evening, I realize that the rest of the neighborhood already hates them.

Therefore, putting the sign in their yard will just be for my own personal chuckle.

sue-
I will share it should it be lawful and un-traceable.

(Otherwise, assume my methods are much like Dustin suggested.)

Thea-
Maybe you were smoking crack when you nominated me?

Hey, wait, do you know my neighbors?

lsig-
I know you're not joking. I think that this is why my current reaction is such white hot hatred. I've lived by dealers before, and I am SO over it.

Oh, they're gonna go.

allrileyedup said...

I used to live next door to a crack dealer (it was New Orleans and all). Now I live next door to a nosy 50-something bachelor who has nothing better to do than knock on my door if he sees my gate open and make sure "everything's okay" and complains about my dog. Frankly, I think I'd rather have the crack dealer. At least he was scared of my dog.

Lynn said...

Have your undesirable neighbors paid their property taxes? Someone could buy the tax lien certificate and foreclose on them.

Have any local real estate friends who owe you? The following would be nice to know:

Is the house under-assessed? If so, the tax assessor should be given the heads-up.

Are they behind on their mortgage? Perhaps they are on a pre-foreclosure list and the real-estate-friend-who-owes-you has pocket investors who like to gobble up such things.

Who is their insurance carrier? Do they have any obvious things that the insurance company would like to know about? Perhaps unrepaired damage, a trampoline, an above-ground swimming pool... If their insurance company dumped them, they would be in deep shit with the mortgage co.

These things would also apply if they rent. It's doubtful that the owner would keep people who threaten his/her ownership.

There are all kinds of ways to open up a perfectly legal can of whup-ass, even when the cops won't do anything.

amy said...

Excellent list! I hang up on those who dont speak either

belsum said...

We've got scary crackerass drug dealers on the corner across the street. The entire neighborhood is agin them and we still haven't managed to get rid of them. If you come up with any brilliant foolproof plans, send 'em my way. Please!